SATIRE NITE LIVE

                                                                               ..... by jerry grant
 

 

              “ THE CHILLER FROM THE THRILLER" 
 



ON YOUR MARK..GET SET.. POW !!!

THEY’RE OFF…

THE INTERNATIONAL MADCAP MEDIA IN THEIR MADDENING PACE HAS KNOCKED DOWN WALLS AND BARRIERS ..ENTERED THE RACE AND DESCENDED ON SANTA MARIA ,CALIFORNIA.

SCHEDULED TO GO TO THE FINISH LINE (WHICH IS NOWHERE IN SIGHT)
IT’S THE MICHAEL JACKSON MOLESTATION TRIAL.

MICHAEL, THE MASTER OF DISGUISE, WHO LIKES TO GO SHOPPING IN MIAMI
WEARING A BLACK MASK..A FEDORA..A RED ARM BAND ,ONE GLOVE AND LOTS OF MEDALS .

CAN YOU BLAME HIM FOR WANTING TO BE INCONSPICUOUS???.. (EVEN HIS KIDS WEAR VEILED BURQUAS) MICHAEL LIKES TO SHOW UP WITH HIS FAMILY ALL WEARING WHITE. WE’RE NOT SURE IF IT’S FOR PURITY OR PARITY?

LET'S HOPE THERE IS NO INDICTMENT AND THEY DON'T HAVE TO SHOW UP IN ORANGE !

GERALDO RIVERA HAS SAID HE WILL SHAVE OFF HIS MUSTACHE IF MICHAEL IS FOUND GUILTY. WHY DOESN’T HE SHAVE OFF ALL HIS HAIR..BECOME A MONK AND SATISFY ALL OF US!

MICHAEL’S FANS STAY UP ALL NIGHT OUTSIDE THE COURTHOUSE, CLAMORING

FOR MICHAEL TO JUMP ON TOP OF A CAR AND DANCE THE ‘CHICKEN’ WHILE THE JUDGE IS WAITING INSIDE DOING ‘THE LONDON BROIL’ !

THEN MICHAEL STEPS INTO THE COURTHOUSE AND GOES THROUGH THE SECURITY SENSORS WHICH START PLAYING ‘RING DEM BELLS’. (APPARENTLY MICHAEL IS WEARING JANET’S NIPPLE RINGS) AND THAT SOUNDS ALARMING !

INSIDE THE 12 JURISTS SEE MICHAEL ENTER AND THEY START DOING THE WAVE.

THIS IS ALL STARTING TO LOOK LIKE THE O.J. TRIAL WAS A REHEARSAL FOR THE MAY SWEEPS.

CHANNEL E WHO STILL HASN’T GOTTEN OVER THE ANNA NICOLE SMITH SHOW..IS PLANNING ON DOING A ONE DAY DELAY ‘ACTOR SIMULCAST’ SO EVERYONE WILL GET THEIR FREE TICKET TO NEVERLAND, WHICH ,BY THE WAY, IS WHAT MICHAEL BUILT BECAUSE HE CLAIMS HE NEVER HAD A CHILDHOOD. APPARENTLY HE NEVER HAD AN ADULTHOOD EITHER. (HE JUST DOESN’T GET IT)

MICHAEL MOORE WHO ASKED BILL O’REILLY IF HE WOULD SEND HIS KID TO FALLUJAH..ALSO COULD HAVE ASKED ANY PARENT IF THEY WOULD SEND THEIR 12 YEAR OLD TO SLEEP OVER AT NEVERLAND WITH A 45 YEAR OLD ???

MICHAEL SAYS HE OFTEN SLEEPS ON THE FLOOR AND WHEN HE CHECKS INTO A HILTON HOTEL, HE ALWAYS ASKS FOR THE MOST COMFORTABLE 'FLOOR PLAN' !

KOBE BRYANT, DIANA ROSS, LIZ TAYLOR, LARRY KING, CHRIS TUCKER, WHO
ARE RUSHING TO MICHAELS DEFENSE.. CAN ALSO BE RECOGNIZED AS THE NEW JACKSON FIVE.

IF LOADS OF CATHOLIC PRIESTS WERE DEFROCKED BECAUSE OF PEDOPHILIA...AND ALL THEY HADFOR BAIT WAS A SONG AND A PRAYER....GO FIGURE NEVERLAND WOULD BE USED FOR BAIT.

AS FOR LISA MARIE…MICHAEL SAID “RETURN TO SENDER” !

MICHAEL’S IMAGE WAS CERTAINLY NOT UPGRADED WHEN ON HIS TOURS HE WOULD ALWAYS GRAB HIS CROTCH. (WAS THAT A SUBLIMINAL MESSAGE OR WHAT?)

THE ARGUMENT THAT NEVERLAND IS DESIGNED FOR THE KIDS OVERLOOKS THAT THERE ARE SEVERAL DISNEYLANDS AND YOU DON’T HAVE TO SLEEP WITH MICHAEL EISNER.

THE CANS OF 'JESUS JUICE ' THAT CAME FROM MICHAEL’S PUB ARE NOT EXACTLY ON THE COKE OR PEPSI THIRST QUENCHER LIST.

UNFORTUNATELY HIS LEGION OF FANS SEE HIM SING AND DANCE BUT THEY DON’T SEE HIM FLING AND PRANCE ABOUT HIS SECRET CATACOMBS AT NEVERLAND.

OR HIDING IN HIS TREE HOUSE FROM PAUL McCARTNEY BECAUSE McCARTNEY WANTS HIS ROYALTIES BACK !

HIS PERSONAL LIBRARY FEATURES NUDIES AND HOTTIES FOR THE KID SET…WHILE THEIR PARENTS ARE HOME WATCHING THE YOUNG AND THE RESTLESS.

HEY MICHAEL YOU HAVE TO REALIZE ALL THE TV WE HAVE SEEN ON YOU SUCH AS THE PIE THROWING MESS-CAPADE WITH LITTLE KIDS IS NOT THRUSTING YOUR IMAGE INTO THE MENSA SOCIETY .

YOUR HALLOWEEN COSTUMES KEEP THE KIDS ENTHRALLED, BUT TRY WEARING ONE TO AN IBM CORPORATE MEETING.

WHO CAN FORGET YOU DANGLING YOUR TINY TOT OVER THE RAILING.
WHY COULDN’T YOU HAVE DANGLED MARK GERAGOS INSTEAD ?

NOW THEY ARE SAYING THAT THEY ARE BRINGING FORTH YOUR 20 MILLION DOLLAR ACCUSER.

THAT SHOULD ENTITLE YOU TO AN INVENTORY OF WHAT HE PURCHASED WITH THE 20 MILLION AND A REBATE !

THE POLICE INTERROGATED BUBBLES THE CHIMP BUT BUBBLES AIN’T TALKING !

AND THE JUDGE SAYS THAT WHEN YOU TAKE THE STAND, THE UMBRELLA HAS TO GO!

 

 

 

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